First thing's first-a picture
Now when you spot this nyphomaniac follow the simple steps below and you could soon be getting beneath that rather lovely (revealing, sexy...anything else that springs to mind) underwear!!! OH YES!!!! We tell you no lies this girl is on the prowl for a Barrow pisshead just like you!

Beginners guide to pulling Suzie!

If you are indeed desperate enough to want to stalk a weird Scottish 'lady' (lady used in the broadest sense of the word) and apends time learning about bogtrashers, read below.
1) WHERE WILL SHE BE?
This is relatevely easy. Timetable for suzie as follows......

MONDAY. AM-College (social area-NEVER IN LESSONS). PM-Barrow town centre getting pissed.

TUESDAY. AM-College (social area-NEVER IN LESSONS). PM-Barrow town centre getting pissed.

WEDNESDAY. AM-College (social area-NEVER IN LESSONS). PM-Barrow town centre getting pissed.

THURSDAY. AM-College (social area-NEVER IN LESSONS). PM-Barrow town centre getting pissed, bout 2 o clock Friday AM round Ben's friends getting shagged.

FRIDAY. AM-College (social area-NEVER IN LESSONS). PM-Barrow town centre getting pissed.

SATURDAY. AM-in detox. PM-In Barrow town centre getting pissed, may shag Ben.

SUNDAY. AM-in detox. PM-on phone to friends bragging about Ben's penis size.

2) WHAT SHOULD YOU DO TO GET INTO HER KNICKERS?
This is v. simple because she is desperate. If you are good looking just look in her direction and she'll molester you. If you are ugly buy her a drink, she's a lightweight, and still desperate. If you look like my dad take her from behind (her motto is 'any hole's a goal')

3) WHAT SHOULD I DO AFTERWARDS?
Wake up. Have a really strong coffee. Look back to your bed where Suzie is snoring and vibrating like a, er, vibrator. Take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror and wonder where your life has gone wrong and make a rough estimate at how many drinks you had the night before (you must also wonder how you ended up in bed and not in hospital with alchohol poisining).

WELL DONE!!! YOU HAVE SUCCESFULLY FUCKED BARROW'S TOWN BIKE!!!!